Notes of a Defeatist

Tomorrow on Oprah:

Oprah confronts the author(s) of the Old and New Testament of the Holy Bible. Is it a memoir or work of fiction? Did God really create the world in 6 days and who was around to keep track? Did two people really populate the earth? Did Moses really wander the desert for 40 years or did it just feel like 40 years? Was Jesus really the Son of God? Was he born to a virgin mother or was that just thrown in to keep future generations of women out of the backseats of cars?

We feel duped and we want some answers!

My, my Oprah, you have done it again. Saving us all from the lies of a former drug and alcohol addict who turned his life into two best selling memoirs and thanks to you his name is on the tips of everyone’s’ tongues. With that kind of empowerment, we surely won’t fall victim to the painful lies of writers anymore.

Thursday’s public beating of A Million Little Pieces author James Frey proved what Oprah doesn’t know about books, she makes up for in business savvy. This televised public humiliation didn’t have much to do with airing out the “truths” over Frey’s fabrications. The Smoking Gun took care of that one.

Oprah’s indignant bitch slapping of Frey and his editor Nan A. Talese provided a reality check to the publishing world about who really gets people to pick up books—not an ex-frat boy who developed garden-variety problems with drugs and drinking, but Oprah’s recommendation. Frey and Talese showed up maybe out of conscience but more likely because following Oprah’s endorsement the book sold more than 2 million copies and propelled Frey’s second book to the top of the bestseller list. Getting brow beaten and booed with the same spite the Daytime Diva reserves for wife abusers and child molesters James Frey and Nan Talese didn’t dare squander whatever goodwill Oprah might have remaining.

But, ooh. That word.

Memoir.

Throughout Oprah’s crusade to get to the bottom of the Smoking Guns claims, she continued to react with shock at the idea that James Frey’s story isn’t the literal irrefutable truth. Just what did she really expect? Consider the task of remembering every subjective detail and doing that while being drunk and high? We maybe a society of navel gazers but, we do have lives don’t we? Who’s got time for all that recording?

Since Oprah neglected to set aside her ego and take the opportunity to really explore some literary theory we’ll all miss the chance to witness the paradoxical arguments surrounding the author’s intention and various readers’ responses. Book nerd talk, phttp://www.augusten.com/osturing, whatever you want to call it. But, it wouldn’t be Oprah if we delved into topics of cause and effect. No, no. Frey’s ceremony of humiliation had nothing to do with literature. Oprah made someone a lot wealthier, stuck her neck out to defend him, and was made a fool.  After all would this be day-time talk show if there wasn’t a confessional opportunity didn’t and the chance for some kind of life-affirming proclamation?

“If I come out of this experience with anything, it’s being a better person and learning from my mistakes and making sure that I don’t repeat them,” Frey claimed, while Oprah looked on satisfied.

But, just how many other authors’ works will be called into question until the hype around this dies down?
Augusten Burroughs we can smell you sweating.

The publishers know that there are a lot more memoirs out there susceptible to these types of claims. Will Oprah question the truth of Elie Wiesel’s memories in her latest book club pick Night?

While that in of itself could become semantic conversation about the nature of truth, audiences are sure to respond with great passion because no matter what both Frey and Wiesel know how to create a great read. And wasn’t that the point in the first place—to get wrapped up in a great story?

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